pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm like, not good at living.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
