I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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