he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
