Christians are straight up FREAKS
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
