She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
