We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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