I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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