2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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