I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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