:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
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Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
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I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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