I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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