How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
