i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
