found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
