why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
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I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
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I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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