She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Randomize
