So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize