Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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