he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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