I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
