I love having hate sex.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
