I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
