in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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