Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
We were destined to go to rehab together
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
