i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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