look no pants
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
