I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
