just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Randomize
