You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
