They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
