Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
my nose is crying tears of wow.
you never un-have a 4some
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
