Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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