Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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