all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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