I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
lets start a swedish sibling band together
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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