Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
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I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
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Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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