she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
