you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
