Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
