No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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