Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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