I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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