Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
