so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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