All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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