all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
