Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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