I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
