I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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