NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
